GOTCHA!

  
    Three years ago on November 9, a family of three packed their bags and flew 26 hours to the other side of the world to meet family member number 4, thus completing their family.  It is hard to believe all that has happened in three very short, sometimes very long years.  "Gotcha Day" is officially November 12, the day Addilyn Grace WenZhi bounded into our lives.  This is the day that we became a Forever Family.  Addi says that her Gotcha Day is WAY more important to her than her birthday (which happens to be December 28, 2000).  She says, and with her typical Addi-tude, "After all, Gotcha Day was the day I was "birthed" (air quotes included) into my family!"  She became an American citizen on November 21st and we began our journey home on November 22.  Her little feet touched American soil first in Detroit, Michigan then in Springfield, Missouri on November 23...Thanksgiving Day!  So much to be thankful for....then and now!

Addi sees life and extracts everything possible from it, sometimes to the point of exasperation of those around her.  We have never laughed so much in our entire lives.  She is witty and inquisitive.  She is "scary smart" as her Grande' calls her and she is an incredible book worm like her Po-Po.  She can be sweet as honey one minute and madder than a hornet the next, and you are never quite sure what makes her turn on that dime of emotion.  The biggest blessing that Addi has brought us is joy unspeakable.  She exudes it from every pore of her little body and she demands it from every moment that she lives.   We are quite sure she will rise to the occasion of her life...she already has success in this area!  Her future looks promising.  We are quite sure that she will be a Supreme Court Justice because her skill in closing arguments continues to exhaust and astound us.  Of course, Addi has her sights set much higher, and that being on the stars.  She wants to be an astronaut..."I want to see Earth from God's point of view!" This being said, her heart is full of Jesus.  She accepted the LORD as her Savior a mere 11 months to the day of coming home.  And the LORD is going to use her in a mighty way.  He already has so many times in our lives.  However, she also wants to travel back to China to tell her teachers and her Nai-Nai (foster grandmother) about Jesus.  "Mom, they don't know Jesus!!  They don't get that Buddah is dead and Jesus is Alive!  Someone needs to tell them!  Why not me!?!"   Simple faith, incredible love.

Addi has forever changed our lives.  She has brought many challenges and lessons, but she has also brought much joy and many blessings.  She has added a dimension and dynamic to our family that we never knew could exist. I personally, now have a lot more gray hair.  This child has literally given me a run for my money!!  However, Addi has also evoked in me the need to be absolutely silly and have more fun in public places by singing show tunes at the top of my lungs...something that has Ashlyn disowning me in pure mortification.  David now has two girls that wrap him around their little fingers.  Both make him one proud papa, but they do it in entirely different ways.  Ashlyn with her quiet, gentle spirit and Addi with her zeal for life that evokes the crazies in a person (hence the above mentioned show tunes...yes, she has David singing them too!) 

As for Ashlyn, Addi has made her a sister in every sense of the word.  They are either huggin' each others necks or they are at each others throats!  My Addi's quest for knowledge, attention, and life in general is often a bit much for my reserved, quiet, thinker Ashlyn.  I tell everyone that the two of them will make a great traveling side show...Ashlyn can hoist the curtain and Addi is THE SHOW!!  I am truly, one balanced momma!

 

  We have been asked MANY times about our decision to adopt Addi. "What were you thinking?" is a question we get asked frequently and quite frankly, we have even asked it of ourselves in moments of frustration.  God in his Infinite Wisdom one day gave David the perfect answer to that question.  "We were NOT thinking.  We were OBEYING!"  I wonder sometimes if God does not ask Himself the same question when He looks at us.  Do you think He looks at Jesus and the Spirit and says, "What were WE thinking?"   Do you think He looks at Jesus knowing the price He paid and asks of us, "What are YOU thinking?"   I think not.  God's ways are Higher.  

     Through adopting Addi, through the love we have for her, through the love she has given to us, we have all learned a most important lesson.  God has shown us through this earthly adoption of Addilyn that He has given us a perfect example of His plan for us all to be adopted into His Forever Family through His Son, Jesus.  We were all once wandering without love, without hope, without a Forever Family.  Then, through Jesus, God adopts us, loves us, and gives us more than we could ever hope or imagine.  He loves us when we make Him laugh. He loves us when we make Him proud. He loves us when we frustrate Him.  He love us when we exasperate Him. Most of all, He loves us for no other reason than the sake of our being, and that is a love that is undeserving, unfathomable, unchangeable.  It is a love that says, "I'm your Forever Family! I'm here to love you! I'm all you'll ever need!"  "Gotcha!"

Perspective

Throughout different seasons of my life, the LORD will bless me with a particular word that He wants me to fully "get" or comprehend.  Often times, these words present themselves over and over again in my life through circumstances, council, and conversations.  The words become concepts but, eventually, if I allow the LORD to have His way with me, they become convictions.  

Many times, these words come to me and I am offended.  After all, who wants to hear words such as "Submission", "Obedience", or "Brokenness" over and over again!?!  Furthermore, who wants to have these words played out in daily occurances, casual conversations, or simple coincidences?!  But that is how the LORD is with me.  I am hard-headed and He is gracious.   He knows I need repetition, the remedial course, and many, many field trips in order to ultimately learn that His Ways are Higher.  So graciously, He repeats Himself (okay, He repeats Himself over and over again!) until the word sinks into the marrow of my being.  Such is the latest word He has given me ~ Perspective.

This concept of  "perspective" has been making itself known ever so slowly for about 15 months now.  (I told you I was hard-headed and a slow learner).  For many of you, you can figure the math and know that a move to Georgia occurred about 15 months ago.  Of course, when God first introduced this concept of perspective to me, I only wanted the concept of perspective to include staying in Missouri.  I did not want the perspective of moving to Georgia.  I was offended that He would even think of moving me out of my comfort zone.  I fought His perspective on every front.  The battle ensued.  Kicking, screaming, fit throwing, and tantrums at the feet of Jesus occurred all in the name of my perspective.  Yet God persisted, ever so lovingly, to continue to show me His perspective.

It has been stated that there are approximately seven different learning styles.  If my memory serves me correctly from my college years, these learning styles include Audible, Kinesthetic, Intra-personal, Inter-personal, Musical, Visual, and Spatial.  Most people have a dominant style of learning.  Not this hard-headed individual!!!  When I am really needing to be taught something, ALL the learning styles are incorporated!!  God leaves no learning style left behind!  Nope, for me He utilizes them all!!  He has intricately woven the word "perspective" into Sunday School lessons and daily devotional readings.  There have been songs on the radio about gaining a different perspective.  The concept has been sprinkled into conversations with friends and sermons from my pastor.  (My moving kinesthetically...now there is a whole other perspective that not many need to see!)  And just recently, God mixed the idea into a moment that I had with my David and the girls and He allowed us all an opportunity to gain perspective both visually and "spatially".

Over the weekend, we learned of an event that was taking place at Providence Canyon State Park.  The park is about an hour and a half from our house.  We left about 7:00pm...our goal...a night with the stars!!  The Astronomy Department at Columbus State University was hosting a "star gazing event".  They brought out five 10-inch telescopes and one 14-inch telescope for the public to enjoy.  These were HUGE scopes!!  The Astronomy students would locate a constellation and then announce their findings and the general public in attendance would be able to view the stars through the various scopes.  Now it might need to be said here that God orchestrated an incredible night.  It was a new moon (so, no moon in the sky), the sky was void of clouds, and the air was crisp.  Okay, it was cold...37 degrees...but we were blessed with layers of coats, gloves, and hats.  Ashlyn was freezing and Addi was ready to leave her coat in the car.  God met us in the parking lot as we got out of the car and looked up.  We were an hour or so away from city lights.  The park was pitch black which made the stars look as if they were supernaturally closer than normal.  We could actually see depths, dimensions, and layers of stars.  We viewed a dying star that looked like a blue doughnut.  We saw another mass that appeared to be a dumbbell in shape. We saw the Seven Sisters, Pleiades, which was not a mere seven stars, but hundreds of stars making themselves known through the scope.  We saw Jupiter and three of her moons.  We saw "the eye of the bull", Taurus, which was a red star.  All in all, it looked as if we were viewing diamonds on black velvet.  We removed ourselves from the city and momentarily gazed towards the heavens for a different view.

Jupiter and her moons

As we were leaving our visual and "spatial" field trip, we were listening to the girls talk.  They commented on the vast number of stars that they normally see in our backyard and the "gazillions" they saw at the state park.  Comments like "I never knew there were so many!" and "They are so pretty to be just masses of gas!" filtered forward from the backseat.  And then that word "perspective" made its way into the conversation.  Ashlyn mentioned what we...not only people, but planet Earth, must look like from God's Perspective.  Addi stated how big and important we sometimes think we are, but how small we must appear from space.  And yet God knows the very numbers of hair on our heads, just like he knows the sheer number of stars in the heavens.  David brought up the impending move, how it will affect us and effect us, and how developing a different perspective might be helpful.  How sometimes God in His vast knowledge of the heavens sees fit to move us from one place to another so that we might gain insight and perspective into our lives and upon Kingdom ways of thinking.  We talked about how thanks to God, we are moved from one place to another, sometimes unwillingly, but always for our best interest.  Ashlyn interjected that she was NOT going to like moving and that she wished we could just stay in Georgia.  I told her I understood and that I didn't like moving from Missouri or leaving my comfort zone.  However, God may need us to move not only because He needs us to do some Kingdom work in another location, but because He knows what is in our best interest.   I reminded her of the verse in Isaiah 55:8 "My ways are not your ways," declares the LORD.  (I always have to shout the "declares" part!) 

Pleiades, the Seven Sisters

It was here I realized that the concept had become a conviction.  I was teaching my daughters the very thing that God had been trying to teach me.  I realized that taking on God's Perspective is far greater than trying to learn from my own perspective.  On a heavenly, star filled night, I was reminded of my finite thinking and God's infinite ways.  He set the stars in the sky and He knows them by name!  Through His persistence, He inundates me until I am awestruck.  I am simple and thickheaded, yet so loved by God, that I can do nothing but stand in His presence in complete amazement, gratitude, and humbleness. 

And gently, ever so gently, He repeatedly shows me His perspective.

Mud Puddles and White Tires

Okay, I have to say that sinning is something I do everyday.  I'm not proud of it.  It annoys me that I do it, both the subconscious sinning and the conscious sinning.  It annoys and saddens me that I let my Jesus down.  It annoys me that I fail Him and I fail myself.  I take no pride in the sin.  I take no pride in the Grace I receive unmeritously and unmercifully each and every time I repent of each sin that I have committed.   In fact, I stand in amazement that my Jesus forgives me each and every time I run to Him and confess my sins.  

So today, sin met me face to face and it flung from my lips at lightening speed.  So quick it happened, that I myself could not believe the rapidity from which it came!  

Addi learned a WHOLE lot today at Koonce Elementary.  She learned about Haiku and wrote about 5 of them on her own.  She learned about common factors and found commonalities of several numbers.  She learned the difference between "numerical" and "new miracle" (I had never really "heard" the difference before, but had to clear up to her that we were finding numbers, not wonders and amazements performed by Jesus.)  We went on a "field trip" to hear The African Children's Choir with friends where Addi learned about the death, disease, and despair that is plaguing the continent of Africa. And we learned a lesson about lying.  

Addi rode her bike through a mud puddle today.  Not surprising.  Not a big deal.  The big deal happened when she lied about it.  And she lied about it to her big sister. 

Addi meets Ashlyn at the bus stop every day.  It is her absolute FAVORITE time of the day!! It is like she is getting a present every time Ashlyn comes home! (I so wish Ashlyn could see it that way!)  Today, on the way to the bus stop, a mud puddle beckoned.  And Addi could not resist.  Again, not a big deal.  However, Ashlyn, being Ashlyn, and NEVER thinking of riding her bike through a mud puddle, questions the fun-loving adventurous one..."Hey Addi, why are your wheels covered in mud?"

Now, not wanting to be questioned by the one she looks up to, and quite possibly not believing that her straight-forward, straight-arrow, type-A, OCD big sister would think of NOT riding her bike through a big mud puddle, Addi answers with a lie,  "I DON'T KNOW!"    

( Of course she knows....It's a mud puddle...YOU RIDE THROUGH IT FOR THE MERE FUN OF IT!!!)

The big sister informer returns to the house with happy-go-lucky, mud-loving, little sister and proceeds to proclaim that she needs to "chat" with me about an issue.  Addi removes herself from the room, probably because she knows that tattling on her is about to ensue.  Ashlyn states that Addi tried to "cover" the "I Don't Know"  lie with a quick, "I want you to guess!" lie.  Ashlyn had tried to explain to Addi that there is a difference and she should not lie.  

I go out to the survey the tires.  I find that there really is not very much mud.  It just a little bit.  But there is a bigger issue behind that little bit of mud.  Addi joins me in the garage.  "Yea, about the tires..." she proceeds.  

I respond, "Yes." 

"Well, there was this mud puddle..."  

I say, "Did you lie?"  

Head cocks backward on the accused and again she claims, "I wanted her to guess!" 

At this point I should have prayed, "Lord, please make my words as sweet as honey, for I might soon have to eat them!"  

But I didn't.  Instead I said, "Addi, you are part of our family.  This family does not lie!  If you ride your bike through a mud puddle, say proudly, "I rode my bike through a mud puddle" when someone asks you why you have mud on your tires!  Do you understand?  We don't practice lying. God does not like lying. We don't lie in our family!"

Now here's where the rubber meets the road, the heart meets the mouth, the truth meets the life I live, and God gives me a chance to put my words into action. 

Not 5 minutes later, a loud knock at the garage door occurs.  It startles me, the children, and the dog starts barking ferociously.  I have Ashlyn hold the dog as I cautiously open the door, and walk outside, by myself, to hear a man saying, "Your dog is not going to bite me, is he?"

LIE #1 flings from my mouth..."SHE might!"  (A lie because Katy would soon lick you to death as bite a complete stranger!)

The man is from Shoeleather Steak Company and he has just visited my neighbors and has a wonderful sale going on and a few bargains that he has left in his truck just for me.  He asks me,  "Do you eat steak?!?!"

And before I know it LIE #2 is flinging from my lips....

"No! We are vegetarians!!"

To which Shoeleather Steak man says, "Okay, ma'am. Well, God Bless!"

I walked back into the house to find Ashlyn wide-eyed and still holding the dog.  I look at her and say,  "I have just sinned!! I need to repent! We own a flesh-eating dog and we are now vegetarians!" To this she replies, "Mom, how could you!?!  After what you just said to Addi!"  

I said, "I DON'T KNOW!!"

The truth is we do know.  We sin to get out of things, to save our necks, to not be bothered.  We sin because we think it is easier, quicker, and better than telling the truth.  We sin because we like the mud puddles and the way the mud feels under our tires, even if it is just a little bit and not very much mud at all.  My telling the Steakman that we are vegetarians was no different than Addi telling Ashlyn "I don't know!"  I did not want to take any time with the Steakman, to hear about his sales or the leanness and superior quality of his corn-fed cattle, or to be bothered by him.  Addi did not want to hear a lecture about the chemical compound of mud and its effects on tires, or about her choice in off-road transportation, or to be bothered by a big sister.  Both of us sinned and both of us learned a lesson in lying. 

I'm not proud that I have to learn lessons this way.  I do not like confessing my sins to my Jesus or my children.  Hopefully, they will learn from my mistakes and from my sins.  Hopefully, and more importantly, I pray that they will see, that when I ride my bike through the mud puddles of life, I keep on riding. I pedal as fast as I can, right up to my Jesus, confess my sin, and ask for His forgiveness. 

And thankfully, graciously, and most lovingly He sprays me off and gives me brand new white tires!!