Bug Spray

     I wrote a devotional for Protestant Women of the Chapel group today.   I am blessed to be a part of the PWOC International Conference Prayer Team.  These are ladies that are spread out across the world praying for an incredible conference that will be held in the fall. The conference will host military spouses, retired spouses, and active duty women who attend PWOC around the world at all of the military posts. The Prayer Coordinator liked it so much she honored me by asking if she could send it out to the PWOC ladies here at Fort Knox.  (gulp...I might have to come face to face with some of my readers!)
So here it is:

     We are moving into "March Madness" in our home and I'm not talking basketball here!! I'm talking about my calendar and all of the events that have filled my days, long before I have even flipped to the new month!! I know we are all here! What keeps me focused in maddening times like this is staying focused and filling my days with praises to the Ancient of Days.  I'm quite sure He has had His fair share of "madness"!!  

(Think about what His calendar looked like on Day 6 of Creation - YIKES! The animals!!)

I also try to remember when I'm running from one girl"s swimming lesson to the other girl's band practice, that whatever I do, however I do it, I do it to the Glory of the One who made me!!  This really comes in handy when I'm making breakfast at 5:30am, or packing lunches, or doing laundry.  

I try to keep in mind that He loves me and that He has a specific purpose for me that only I can do!!

 (Which, apparently, in my household, is scrubbing toilets!!!)

 Now, I pray that the following analogy brings a smile to your face.  It may be a little bit under the category of "stretching it", but the topic is one that keeps coming up in my Bible Study.  I figure if there are 17 Ladies that are struggling with this type of thing in the middle of Kentucky, chances are, there are a lot of others who struggle around the globe.  

The enemy is not, can not, and will never be omnipresent.  

However, he has employed imps, minions, and demons to do his dirty work for him.  

We must never forget that our struggles are not of this world. (Eph. 6:12).  

Praise God that He is Omniscient, Omnipresent, All-Powerful, and Almighty!!   

Hope you don't mind a few insects...  

A common theme that keeps coming up in my heart and mind is what I tell my Bible Study Ladies are the "whispers" and "tickles" of the ear from the enemy.  You know the tickles of "you're not good enough", "you're a failure", "you're not worthy", "you're not lovable", "you're a terrible mom/sister/wife/friend/person."  

We all have these whispers and they come in many forms. They come at all times, 

like a gnat that buzzes in your ear.  

Swat it away, it comes right back.  

 I wonder how many of us need a good can of "RAID" to rid ourselves from the annoyances of those pesky imps of the enemy?  How many of us get tired of swatting and just become accustom to the buzz?  How many of us allow the gnats to nest in our ears, creating more and more of the pesky insects until we have become completely infested with the lies?  

 Do we not know that we have THE EXTERMINATOR?  

    Our God is All-Powerful, All-Knowing, and All-Sufficient!! 

He can exterminate those gnats that are doing the enemy's work because 

He is LORD of ALL!!!  

We can call on Him and He will exterminate the gnats and rid you of that infestation, if you allow Him to do so.  We merely have to call on Him, humble ourselves and seek His face, and He will heal us. (2 Chron. 7:14)  

     I think many of our sisters today need to call The Exterminator.  Maybe some of us need to call on Him. We need to hand each other that can of "RAID"

 (or the Christian Brand of the famous aerosol spray - "PRAY" ) and say, 

"I know someone who loves you merely because you are you!  He made you and pronounced you "GOOD!" You are an original masterpiece.  (Eph 2:8-10)  Don't listen to the lies, whispers, and tickles of the enemy!  Quit swatting them away, only for them to return. Exterminate the enemy with God's love...

a love He has specifically and personally for you!!"  

     Is anyone else here? I'm sure there have been times that you found yourself in a swarm!!  And if we have a plague of gnats,...what about our other friends or sisters?  Are they swatting their ears?  Grab your cans, ladies!!  Let's spray and PRAY and call on the great Exterminator who destroys the lies and restores our hope.  

May we bring sweet melodies of praise to His ear because He has rid our ears from the buzz of the enemy.   

Quit swattin'!  Let us be armed with our can of "PRAY".  

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and PRAY and seek my face and turn form their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land."  ~ 2 Chronicles 7:14  

 "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— 9 not by works, so that no one can boast. 10 For we are God’s handiwork ~ His masterpiece, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." 

Ephesians 2:8-10 

"For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms." 

~ Ephesians 6:12 

"And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people."  

Ephesians 6:18 

 May you all have a blessed week!!   

All is Grace and Blessings,
Stefi

"Clean Up on Aisle 5"

I lost it today in the Commissary.  Flat out, big heap of tears, snorting.

Right there on Aisle 5. 

No, it wasn't because it was Pay Day and the place was packed.  No, someone didn't mistake the back of my heel for a speed bump.  No, it wasn't because I couldn't find my favorite bag of chips.

It was because I was overwhelmed, broken, and convicted with...
all of the choices.  

Now, before you go thinking that I have completely lost it, (which believe me, by the time you are finished reading this, you will know beyond a shadow of a doubt, I truly have lost it!), I need to back up and tell you what has been going on in the crazy world in which I live and function.

Not much.

That's right.

No Crisis. No stress. No pressures.  

Other than the usual running kids to various activities, scrapbooking (yes, I actually started and have 6 pages completed...can I PLEASE get an "Atta Girl"), and teaching a Bible Study, my life right now is relatively mild compared to other seasons I have lived through.  And just to caveat...I am not asking for a crisis right now.  I'm still trying to figure out how to deal with a low-stress, "normal" lifestyle. (Who lives like this anyway?)

However, I have had a "Crisis of Belief" lately.  Henry Blackaby, of Experiencing God fame, describes a "Crisis of Belief" as "when God invites you to work with Him, this always leads to a Crisis of Belief that requires faith and action. It is a turning point or a fork in the road that calls for a decision. With it, you must decide what you believe about God."  So here's my Crisis of Belief...

At the beginning of the year, our family set out to make our yearly goals.  You know, things that you hope to accomplish by the end of year's time.  You could call them "New Year's Resolutions" but I don't like that.  With "Resolutions" come implied failure.  I don't want to fail.  So, we say "goals".  We sit down and think about how we would like to be different in one year's time.  When we did this last year, we had the questions of "retirement" looming over us. Since we did not know where we would be, we had the girls list out what they would like our next home/community to look like.  Here's the amazing part...GOD answered all of their "goals" AND their "wants and desires".  EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM!!  To include a house with hardwood floors (Addi wanted this as her #1 desire, #2. a basement, #3. "Lots of kids who will be my friends."  Why in this order? Who knows...it's Addi.) We have it all...EVERYTHING on BOTH girl's lists!! GOD IS SO GOOD!!  How He blesses us so!!

So back to the "goals" for 2012 and my Crisis of Belief.  I listed many things of great importance to me...# 1. begin scrapbooking...check!  # 2. Read the Bible in Chronological Order...so far so good! I can honestly say that I have kept up with the reading and God has revealed things to me, (even in Leviticus), that I have never seen, grasped, or even thought of before now.  # 3. Begin writing my book...it's in my head, I just have to get it out and onto the paper...I'm still working on this goal! # 4. Read more for pleasure...
check...and pause here.

Here is where my meltdown originated. 

Reading more.  A seemingly simple goal.  Except for one thing.  I have weird reading habits.  Here's how I read....I get a bunch of books and I read them all at one time.  That's right, the same time!! I flit from chapter to chapter in different books.  I know it's weird.  I'm just ADHD that way!!  I get easily bored when I read, so before I flip to the back of the book to see how it ends, I just grab another book and pick up where I left off.  It is either weird or it is a talent.  I'll go for weird.  And non-fiction is my favorite.  I will read fiction, sometimes.  Especially when someone goes on and on about how great a book is and that I must read it.  And here's where you stop and question yourself..."Did I read that correctly above? Is Stefi going to write a book?" Yep, you read that correctly.  No telling HOW that thing is going to come out!!

Anyway, I began my reading goal by ordering a bunch of books from Amazon.  I arrived at my selection based on a couple of suggestions from friends and Amazon's enticement of "you are just $$$ away from FREE SHIPPING.  Might we suggest________"  So a couple of days later, my reading list comes, and not a dime was spent on shipping!!!  Here's what I ordered:

The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment, by Jeremiah Burroughs

7 An Experimental Mutiny of Excess by Jen Hatmaker

The Treasure Principal by Randy Alcorn

What Women Fear by Angie Smith

Anyone see any common themes?  In a nutshell, Rare Jewel is about Contentment, 7 is about getting rid of stuff,  TP is about giving stuff away, and the last one...FEAR.   Hmmmm.....  Think God is trying to tell me something?  I begin my flurry of reading a multitude of chapters and God begins to work in my heart.  

Here's where He begins...

"Stefi, are you content?"  

Okay...nothing like going for the jugular right out of the starting gate!!  

"Stefi, you have A LOT of stuff!"  

Why, yes I do! And I like it!!  

"Stefi, where are your treasures?"  

 Umm, around me? Right?!  

"Stefi, why do you fear?"  

Wait a minute! 

You're not going to ask me "WHAT I FEAR?, but "WHY?"  Is that really fair?

  "Stefi, I want your heart to break!"  

NOW WAIT A MINUTE!!!! 

And then He REALLY begins to work on me.  He asks me to count my shoes and my shirts....too many.  He asks me to take inventory of my pantry....you purchased how many cans of beans and boxes of cereal? He directs my attention to my linen closet....you own how many sets of towels and sheets and BLANKETS?  Really?  You live in Kentucky, NOT Alaska!!

But He does not stop there...

Enter the Commissary.  Deli Counter to be exact.  As I am waiting in line for Lemon Pepper Chicken, sliced thin for sandwiches, it hits me.  I have 87 varieties of deli meat starring me in the face. The lady in front of me orders "ham".  The deli lady says, "What kind of ham, ma'am? And would you like that sliced or shaved?"  Seriously. 

And it is here, over lunch meat, that God decides to breaks my heart.

  

An image of a child flashes across my mind.  A child that is hungry.  A child that is lonely.  Somewhere, that child is not choosing between Lemon Pepper Chicken or Cajun Turkey or Maple Honey Cured Ham.  Somewhere that child is eating their only choice for the entire day...

rice.  

And that's where I lose it.  Right there over lunch meat.  I can barely order my pound of Lemon Pepper Chicken sliced thin for sandwiches.  The deli lady looks at me strange and asks if I need anything else.  I want to shout, "Can you send all of this to Uganda?", but I fear she will call store security.  I look at my butcher paper wrapped pound of deli meat and read the price of $8.58 and wonder, "How many children could this amount of money feed?"  

Another image of a hungry child flashes in my mind.  

"GOD, What are YOU doing to me?" I plead.   

My heart aches as I continue down my list and through the aisles wondering as I fill my cart, how many children will feel empty today. How many will go hungry.  How many mommas will be unable to give their children anything to eat.  I begin to question myself as I put items in my cart..."Do I really need this?"   I head to the checkout line.  As the cashier totals my bill and announces that I owe $111.53, I look at my 5 bags of groceries and wonder, "How many children could have been fed on $111.53?"  

Tears rolling down my face, I shout in my head,

 "Oh GOD!! STOP THIS!!"  

But I fear that I'm not asking Him to stop the images of children in my head. 

I fear that what I will hear is His voice responding.

The bagger and cashier both look at me strange.  I am expecting to hear at any minute,

 "Clean up on Aisle 5!!!!"

I don't know where this is all going.  Amongst the words, "Contentment" and "Excess" and "Treasure" and "Fear",  I hear two more words.  

 It is a whisper...

"Join Me!" 

I want to shout back, "Where?" but in my heart I know that "Where?" is not the question, nor is "When?" and neither is "How?" All of these questions will soon be answered.  

For now, I need to get a handle on "Contentment" and that it is only found in Jesus, ~

"In whatsoever state I am in, therewith to be content." Philippians 4:11 

I need to get rid of excess, ~ 

"Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had pride, excess of food, and prosperous ease, but did not aid the poor and needy." Ezekiel 16:49 

I need to understand what I truly treasure, ~ 

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:21. 

And above all, I need to truly get a hold of my fear, ~

 "The fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding."  Proverbs 9:10.

Perhaps if I can focus on these things, I can begin to respond accordingly.  So when the time comes, and I know that it is coming soon, the shout that cries...

 "Join Me!!"

...maybe then I'll be able to shout right back...

"Here I am LORD! Send Me!!"

In the meantime, if you see me in the Commissary, know that I am probably struggling with a cart full of items and a heart breaking for hungry children.  Don't worry.  

GOD is dealing with me!  I'm a work in progress!

And as a side note, when you see me, could you remind me to pick up a box of Kleenex.  Seems I got home after my meltdown, and Kleenex was the one item on my list I forgot to buy.

Kleenex....of all things!