Okay, I have to say that sinning is something I do everyday. I'm not proud of it. It annoys me that I do it, both the subconscious sinning and the conscious sinning. It annoys and saddens me that I let my Jesus down. It annoys me that I fail Him and I fail myself. I take no pride in the sin. I take no pride in the Grace I receive unmeritously and unmercifully each and every time I repent of each sin that I have committed. In fact, I stand in amazement that my Jesus forgives me each and every time I run to Him and confess my sins.
So today, sin met me face to face and it flung from my lips at lightening speed. So quick it happened, that I myself could not believe the rapidity from which it came!
Addi learned a WHOLE lot today at Koonce Elementary. She learned about Haiku and wrote about 5 of them on her own. She learned about common factors and found commonalities of several numbers. She learned the difference between "numerical" and "new miracle" (I had never really "heard" the difference before, but had to clear up to her that we were finding numbers, not wonders and amazements performed by Jesus.) We went on a "field trip" to hear The African Children's Choir with friends where Addi learned about the death, disease, and despair that is plaguing the continent of Africa. And we learned a lesson about lying.
Addi rode her bike through a mud puddle today. Not surprising. Not a big deal. The big deal happened when she lied about it. And she lied about it to her big sister.
Addi meets Ashlyn at the bus stop every day. It is her absolute FAVORITE time of the day!! It is like she is getting a present every time Ashlyn comes home! (I so wish Ashlyn could see it that way!) Today, on the way to the bus stop, a mud puddle beckoned. And Addi could not resist. Again, not a big deal. However, Ashlyn, being Ashlyn, and NEVER thinking of riding her bike through a mud puddle, questions the fun-loving adventurous one..."Hey Addi, why are your wheels covered in mud?"
Now, not wanting to be questioned by the one she looks up to, and quite possibly not believing that her straight-forward, straight-arrow, type-A, OCD big sister would think of NOT riding her bike through a big mud puddle, Addi answers with a lie, "I DON'T KNOW!"
( Of course she knows....It's a mud puddle...YOU RIDE THROUGH IT FOR THE MERE FUN OF IT!!!)
The big sister informer returns to the house with happy-go-lucky, mud-loving, little sister and proceeds to proclaim that she needs to "chat" with me about an issue. Addi removes herself from the room, probably because she knows that tattling on her is about to ensue. Ashlyn states that Addi tried to "cover" the "I Don't Know" lie with a quick, "I want you to guess!" lie. Ashlyn had tried to explain to Addi that there is a difference and she should not lie.
I go out to the survey the tires. I find that there really is not very much mud. It just a little bit. But there is a bigger issue behind that little bit of mud. Addi joins me in the garage. "Yea, about the tires..." she proceeds.
I respond, "Yes."
"Well, there was this mud puddle..."
I say, "Did you lie?"
Head cocks backward on the accused and again she claims, "I wanted her to guess!"
At this point I should have prayed, "Lord, please make my words as sweet as honey, for I might soon have to eat them!"
But I didn't. Instead I said, "Addi, you are part of our family. This family does not lie! If you ride your bike through a mud puddle, say proudly, "I rode my bike through a mud puddle" when someone asks you why you have mud on your tires! Do you understand? We don't practice lying. God does not like lying. We don't lie in our family!"
Now here's where the rubber meets the road, the heart meets the mouth, the truth meets the life I live, and God gives me a chance to put my words into action.
Not 5 minutes later, a loud knock at the garage door occurs. It startles me, the children, and the dog starts barking ferociously. I have Ashlyn hold the dog as I cautiously open the door, and walk outside, by myself, to hear a man saying, "Your dog is not going to bite me, is he?"
LIE #1 flings from my mouth..."SHE might!" (A lie because Katy would soon lick you to death as bite a complete stranger!)
The man is from Shoeleather Steak Company and he has just visited my neighbors and has a wonderful sale going on and a few bargains that he has left in his truck just for me. He asks me, "Do you eat steak?!?!"
And before I know it LIE #2 is flinging from my lips....
"No! We are vegetarians!!"
To which Shoeleather Steak man says, "Okay, ma'am. Well, God Bless!"
I walked back into the house to find Ashlyn wide-eyed and still holding the dog. I look at her and say, "I have just sinned!! I need to repent! We own a flesh-eating dog and we are now vegetarians!" To this she replies, "Mom, how could you!?! After what you just said to Addi!"
I said, "I DON'T KNOW!!"
The truth is we do know. We sin to get out of things, to save our necks, to not be bothered. We sin because we think it is easier, quicker, and better than telling the truth. We sin because we like the mud puddles and the way the mud feels under our tires, even if it is just a little bit and not very much mud at all. My telling the Steakman that we are vegetarians was no different than Addi telling Ashlyn "I don't know!" I did not want to take any time with the Steakman, to hear about his sales or the leanness and superior quality of his corn-fed cattle, or to be bothered by him. Addi did not want to hear a lecture about the chemical compound of mud and its effects on tires, or about her choice in off-road transportation, or to be bothered by a big sister. Both of us sinned and both of us learned a lesson in lying.
I'm not proud that I have to learn lessons this way. I do not like confessing my sins to my Jesus or my children. Hopefully, they will learn from my mistakes and from my sins. Hopefully, and more importantly, I pray that they will see, that when I ride my bike through the mud puddles of life, I keep on riding. I pedal as fast as I can, right up to my Jesus, confess my sin, and ask for His forgiveness.
And thankfully, graciously, and most lovingly He sprays me off and gives me brand new white tires!!
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